Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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