I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
