Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize