Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize