the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
She announced her abortion via fbk
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
