Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
