are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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