dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
