Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
