the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize