went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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