Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Define "chronic" masturbator.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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