I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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