Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
