Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
