the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I cut my penus on the lid.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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