I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
