Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
You pole danced in your parka.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
