Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Randomize
