Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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