under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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