Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize