Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
