Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best revenge is premature balding
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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