i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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