Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
