he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
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Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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