I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I party with great urgency now.
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