Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
