So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
