I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
