That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Randomize
