can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Just high enough for therapy.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
