i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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