ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
