I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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