He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
