i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
