I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
