the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize