just come out here and I will go home with you...
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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