We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
