I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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