"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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