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• (806): View more from Texas

  My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.

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• (845): View more from New York

  I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (661): View more from California

  No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...

  (661): View more from California

  Sorry.

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• (+27): View more from South Africa

  My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  orgasmnado...tomorrow night

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  That's what I'm talking about

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (518): View more from New York

  So do you know how we found out he was engaged?

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  An Amber Alert?

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• (904): View more from Florida

  All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.

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• (940): View more from Texas

  Did you poop on the roof?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  WTH?

  (940): View more from Texas

  Is that a no?

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