Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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