WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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