I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
he had hair everywhere except his balls
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
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