Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
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Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
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This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize