do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
